Friends

Emilia

How do you cope in a world with virtual friends only who share your values?

lisan al gaib

How do you cope in world with virtual friends only who share your values?

Hi, cope about which aspects of virtual relationships or direct relationships?

Having only virtual friends, and no friends in real life?

Emilia

@lisan-al-gaib I'm not finding those relationships challenging, but rather seeking advice on how to navigate a world where one's social circle consists only of virtual friends who align with one's values - I'm referring to values such as like mindedness (including an interest in Ray Peat's work), integrity, higher consciousness, self-awareness, and personal growth.

lisan al gaib

@Emilia said in Friends:

@lisan-al-gaib I'm not finding those relationships challenging, but rather seeking advice on how to navigate a world where one's social circle consists only of virtual friends who align with one's values - I'm referring to values such as like mindedness (including an interest in Ray Peat's work), integrity, higher consciousness, self-awareness, and personal growth.

What do you think is there to navigate with a circle of virtual friends who share your values, what negatives?

Emilia

@lisan-al-gaib some of the negatives are limited depth in relationships and lack of physical presence and activities.

lisan al gaib

@Emilia said in Friends:

@lisan-al-gaib some of the negatives are limited depth in relationships and lack of physical presence and activities.

Okay, you can have excellent relationships with close or distant family members, reconnect with childhood friends or friends you haven't spoken to in a long time, meet new people in the places outside your home that you go to, meet someone, and potentially have children. Also Meeting your online Friends if possible

Emilia

@lisan-al-gaib great ideas although it's not always possible to have deep conversations with those nearby, especially when my friends live in different countries.

bk_

@Emilia It’s hard, especially in the times we live. They’re out there. Pray to God for meaningful friendships to come to you. I have prayed for you.

Emilia

@bk_ Aww that's so kind of you, thank you.

Atman

I think if people are really attracted to each other, either romantically or platonically, they will find a way to meet up, especially nowdays, when you can be at the other side of the globe within a day.
However, I imagine the kind of people who are into reading Ray Peat's work might not be very numerous and at the same time perhaps not the most sociable, and instead tending to cherish a certain level of solitude.

Where do you live? Maybe there are some people here from that area, who are willing to meet up.

Peatful

@Emilia said in Friends:

How do you cope in a world with virtual friends only who share your values?

This is an important question

I have a response
Not that I’m right
But how Ive managed the cataclysmic changes in my closet in real life relationships post Covid

First
I checked my footing
What were my essentials
What was workable
What was unbendable

Then
I grieved
I could forecast how diluted most of my relationships would become- if they were worth investing in at all anymore

Then
I compartmentalized
This is hard
In the relationships I want to keep;
There are just a lot of truths I can’t discuss

Then I reevaluate

I made sure to really try to maintain those precious few that share my core values

This is why moms are so important to girls
And dads for their boys

They should be the anchor so to speak
The safe harbor for us to be as crazy ideologically as we want
Without judgement
With love

ThinPicking

@Emilia said in Friends:

@lisan-al-gaib I'm not finding those relationships challenging, but rather seeking advice on how to navigate a world where one's social circle consists only of virtual friends who align with one's values - I'm referring to values such as like mindedness (including an interest in Ray Peat's work), integrity, higher consciousness, self-awareness, and personal growth.

I know this is easier said than done, but it's probably where energetics count most. Beside the sharing of ritual, which always involves some novelty. Keep in person alive and don't look for alignment/depth or try to force it. Arrive at it.

Go for a walk in the garden... so to speak. No running. Continuously discern of self and of the others, in moments and after the fact. A person may realise they sat down and forgot all about it. It could a minute. It could take them a lifetime. It could be you. It has and could still be me.

If there's something bad in your wake together. Walk back if you want. Don't forget to ask why. And don't worry.

Emilia

@Atman I live in the UK and don't know anyone locally.
I feel that our instinctive self sometimes acts out of fear, loneliness, and insecurity, trying to avoid boredom, which can lead us to choose the wrong relationships. So reflecting on our emotions we're seeking may be helpful. Romance might fade after a few months, but that's where a relationship truly begins. I believe there should be a desire to create and grow together with someone, transcending our egos.

ThinPicking

@Emilia said in Friends:

don't know anyone locally

You can. No rush.

Or travel.

Emilia

@Peatful this is so beautiful, it resonates with me. Thank you.

Peatful

@Emilia said in Friends:

@Peatful this is a beautiful, it resonates with me. Thank you.

Im so glad. Thank you for letting me know.

I hope to see you around the forum.

Emilia

@ThinPicking hello and thank you for your comment.
I understand your point, one must stop resisting.

Emilia

@Peatful I only discovered this site when the server of the raypeatforum was down. It's been a pleasure to find so many kind people here.

Emilia

@ThinPicking I've travelled a lot in the past. I'm a single parent so my options are limited.

ThinPicking

@Emilia said in Friends:

@ThinPicking I've travelled a lot in the past. I'm a single parent so my options are limited.

Ah Emi I meant very much on this land. With and/or to anyone you may already know. And if not for whatever reason, no problem. The other thing then, new acquaintance, new walking (no running!).

I know everything "social" is a special kind of special in the UK because we can all be a bit stiff. Until we're not. And then again. And so on. I don't know what to say other than keep patience, and try not to mind if you give a little heart and someone spills their drink or sneezes on it... so to speak. You'll get it back.

Notice. I know you do. This is only a reminder.