Hating everything everywhere all at once
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@IkeIkeforever said in Hating everything everywhere all at once:
Nails
Great band but yes, very angry stuff. Metal is so broad, there's a lot of other music out there too. Consider fruit and sugar to get energy up.
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@samson thanks for replying !
I go to the restroom I'd say 2-3 times a day, but my feces don't look that consistent. Last time I went they had this clear brown color, and didn't float. It's gross, but if it can help understanding my problem...
I'm on my third day of eating a carrot salad along with a glass of pressed orange juice for breakfast, and have to say that I feel better.
As for the thyroid supplementation, I had bought grass fed dessicated beef liver on nutriest.eu, since I've seen it promotes hair growth (and I wanted to have nice hair at some point). I've stop taking it since I didn't see any change, but it's apparently good for liver health. Nothing on thyroid though.
Do you have any supplementation recommandations ? The grass-fed beef thyroid on nutriest.eu is out of stock at the moment, so if you know of any other good brand/supplement, please let me know !
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And for what you said, about having a vision, it's really hard right now. I live in a place where there is simply no work. And even if I had one, I couldn't possibly buy a place for myself to live in, because the tarrifs are just too high. The best thing would be to get money while still living at my parent's house, but as I said, there's simply no work.
I keep responding to job offers, but now they won't even give me an answer. The offers are just there to make me sign up for temp companies. I keep calling to see if they need someone (I'm forklift certified !) and they always say "no, not for now". It's been like that for a year. I keep hoping for change, but as you've seen, I feel like I'm stuck in some kind of void.
I live in a poor neighborhood, filled with God-only-knows what nationalities the people I'm forced to live with are. There's constant violence, drug-dealing, etc, etc...
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@gg12 Thank you for your answer.
Sleep apnea ? Wouldn't one of the symptoms of this be me waking up at night ?
I feel decently energized when I'm waking up in the morning, I just so happen to hold my breath during the day, when I'm awake and doing anything (groceries, reading, surfing the web, training...).
I'll still try to check if I have sleep apnea. Many thanks.
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@Corngold Thank you for answering !
Hahaha niiice didn't expect a Nails fan to be here ! I've grown really, REALLY fond of Kickback too, with other bands like Hatebreed, Impartial Dismemberment, Tomb Filler...
In the last 3 days, I've completely cut listening to hardcore/metal. If I want to listen to music, I only listen to classical music, ambient, or high-tempo music like Eurobeat, ParaPara, nightcore...this kind of thing...
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I also have to add that my skin felt clearer this morning. I don't know if the carrot salad and the orange juice that could be the reason for it, but I suppose it is since it's the only change of diet I've had in the last few days.
My skin is still peeling at some places though, from my cheeks to my brow ridge. I don't think I've seen Peat say anything about skin peeling, but I don't know Aajonus considered this to be a sign of detoxification. Now, I'm not a "just eat real food bro !" advocate, but if skin peeling in the face correlate to gut/liver health, I guess I really have a problem in there. Will try to get my hands on Harleem oil, T3, bamboo shoots as Mauritio said.
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@IkeIkeforever yeah it's good to be conscious and not always have music. It's kind of a medicine. Check out Wagner and Bruckner, very good for existential and or anger/confusion pain.
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@IkeIkeforever not sure what country you're based in but https://www.meds.com.mx/product_reviews_info.php/products_id/2931/reviews_id/39 is where i got my cynomel. really one of the most impactful sups I've taken. progesterone also helps greatly with a sense of general rage I felt (I work in the service industry, no shortage of retards whose head one might want to rip off)
it might be worth swapping the d3 with a chicken lamp and a red light setup, I find i get a comparable sense of well-being getting blasted by lamps when the sun isn't available.
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Alright, thanks Corngold.
I've listened to very little Wagner in the past, in fact, "Tannhauser Ouverture" is the only work I know from him. I'll look into him.
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@samson Thanks for answering
I live in Europe ! What does cynomel do to support the body ? I don't know much about progesterone, wouldn't it be kind of dangerous to take it just like that, without knowing what I really have ? People on my topic have been talking about hypothyroid, or guts/liver/gallblader issues...I'll look into what progesterone is, and what it can do for me. Many thanks.
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Sorry if I keep messing up the "reply" and "quotes" functions, I'm still not used to the U.I of this website...
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@IkeIkeforever
Yes his preludes and overtures are fantastic. Bruckner's symphonies are sacred. I love death metal but it usually makes me happy and gives stress relief. Different for different people, but there are studies linking metal to increased blood flow in the brain and better stress reduction. -
@IkeIkeforever progesterone is pretty safe and sold in any vitamin shop in the US. if you're interested in cynomel (T3) Danny Roddy has some good stuff simplifying it.
https://dannyroddy.substack.com/p/demystifying-thyroid-supplementation
here's rays article about progesterone as well
https://raypeat.com/articles/articles/three-hormones.shtmlYou can also use the low-toxin forum as a resource for testimonials. used to be the ray peat forum but got bought by a crazy retard, unfortunately.
"______ low toxin forum" in google or whatever will bring up relevant forum posts, since you need to pay to search in site.
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@samson said in Hating everything everywhere all at once:
having good gut motility really does wonders for the mind
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Thanks for the insights samson ! I'll read the articles you've sent me.
Hahaha yeah I remember the story about the old Ray Peat Forum...shame that charlie started to push some kind of vitamin A/low-toxin diet right after Peat's death. He even banned any one saying that his views were wrong right ? Horrible, horrible man...
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Going back on the needed mindset to improve/setting goals.
I didn't say it in my original post, but I've been learning Japanese for two weeks now in autodidact with a book. I have to say that after today's session, I feel good. I'm really glad to have held on on learning a new language despite the mental state in which I was in (I'm still far from being in a really good state of mind, but I already kind of feel better) . Now, thinking about the satisfaction I get after finishing a lesson and its exercices is one of the things that really keeps me going.
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@IkeIkeforever Have you looked into whether there are any free/low cost places you could take Japanese classes in person where you live? Easier said than done, I know, but you might really get something out of doing the activities you're enjoying alongside other people. Language classes are an excellent place to meet people in a natural, engaging way. You're all struggling through something together, and that sometimes produces a comradely feeling. Also, the instructors are often from elsewhere, and then you get to meet interesting people with varied life experience/backgrounds. Just a thought. It sounds as though you are being very diligent with your diet and health and may want to incorporate gradual environmental changes in a complementary way.
Ray Peat always talked about the importance of finding like-minded people with whom you can share a sense of reality--a tall order in the hell world we're living in, but ya never know what new and interesting humans are out there. At the very least, you know they're not in your house.
Also, progesterone is very safe, especially in small doses, and RP consistently recommended it to everyone, for just about everything. It has a calming, stabilizing effect and might be helpful if (like me) you're dealing with trying to tip the scale away from serotonin and toward dopamine. You could always try just a tiny bit and see how you do--easier and safer than experimenting with thyroid, IMO. Just make sure you're getting it from a very good source. I'd recommend idealabs or Kenogen.
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@peatlegal Sadly not...but there is an university cursus that would allow me to study and learn Japanese. It's 1 300 euros though, so I would need to work to be able to join this class. Good reason to try harder to find a job...
Thanks for the info on Progesterone ! I'll try to buy some when I get the money, since I suppose I'll have to pay a crazy tax fee to pay customs...
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Went for a walk to the library today. It felt good to walk, but I grew more and more depressed as I kept walking. Trash everywhere, poor people everywhere, sub-humans everywhere, closed shops everywhere. Kind of forgot about it when I started reading.
I felt like I was about to cry when I was nearing home. No future, no opportunities, constant poverty. I still want to annihilate everything, but I also want to fight for a just cause. Sadly, there's no such thing where I live. Ray's works on learned helplessness bogled my mind. I don't want to just die, I want to fight.
It feels like I've been fighting for my own life all this time. All this effort can't be in vain...