@Ray-Peat-Fanboy said in Is being incel the "new normal" in 2024?:
Just because a man is unable to get a long term girlfriend , or have sex , doesn't mean that he is automatically going to be filled with hatred towards people lol . Some of them might feel lonely or depressed but thats all. Being unable to get a girlfriend or sex doesn't make you a bad person.
You don't sound like an incel. This is what incels do for fun. Well, that's what they do when they aren't actually murdering people and committing mass shootings. They don't actually want a girlfriend. In fact getting a girlfriend would destroy their whole worldview.
To me you just sound like a loner who hasn't had much experience with socially interacting with women. Even if it feels unnatural to you, you need to force yourself into social situations. A man's biggest hurdle to getting laid is the fear of rejection. Once you overcome this it won't matter to you anymore because you realize it's just a numbers game.
If you find yourself being too socially awkward you could read some books on "pickup artistry." There's a lot of good tidbits in some of them for inexperienced males on social etiquette. I would just caution you to avoid the whole pickup artist culture, which tends to view women and sex as a game more so than finding meaningful partners. Which isn't a healthy attitude to have, and in the worst of scenarios could even devolve into misogynistic behavior. But the introductory phases can be useful.
Lastly, If you want to refine your game, look into the sexual market value system, it's really one of the most accurate analytical frameworks to assess a man's "desirability." This isn't really needed if your end goal is to just have a girlfriend or wife. But if you're one of those dudes that appeals to the sex positive "one night stand" thing, the SMV system when applied appropriately will help you achieve this.
